2015

The year I went to Japan and got so worried the whole 10 months before the trip because I could barely afford it. I was also worried about getting around and getting lost. Everything turned out fine and that week spent in Osaka, Kyoto and Nara with my mom ended up being the highlight of my year.

The year I applied for a New Zealand scholarship and got accepted. 

The year I regained some sense of accomplishment not only for getting the scholarship but for actually completing the requirements. I actually stuck to something and finished it – this is a big deal.

The year that sparked hope and opened a door I didn’t know I wanted.

The year that got me excited about the future. Even if this excitement is also 80% anxiety.

The year Jack Harries visited the Philippines and upon finding out, I had to call one of my closest friends because it was one of the most excited I’ve ever felt. I never call people unless it’s absolutely necessary and even then I do it reluctantly. I never met Jack though. That would’ve been the highlight of my year.

The year I became even more obsessed with the Jacksgap crew – a bunch of talented human beings from the UK living the life I constantly daydream about.

The year I performed onstage again, which rekindled my love for theater but also reminded me how limited I am as an actor.

The year I climbed 8 mountains.

The year I fell in love with hiking and nature and anyone who shared the same love for the great outdoors (aka 80% of the people I follow on Instagram).

The year I almost went to Sydney for free. 

The year I finally stepped on Mindanao soil.

The year One Direction went to Manila and every girl, including me, went gaga! The same year I regret scrimping on a ticket. We couldn’t see them from where we were but at least they were projected on huge screens. It was enough and not enough at the same time.

The year Zayn left 1D and the inevitable crumbling of the latter.

The year Harry Styles got even more attractive. Goddamnit.

The year of endless work drama, gossip and negativity.

The year I’m not so proud of my work attitude. 

The year I was late for work everyday.

The year of extreme frustration over the state of public transport and traffic in Metro Manila (which was emphasized a gazillion times after experiencing Japan’s efficient trains and bike culture).

The year I cried countless times on my way to work or going home because of the horrible traffic, exhausting routine and hopelessness.

The year I held back tears on Christmas eve and New Year’s eve for reasons I’m not really sure of, or can’t put into words.

The year fraught with overthinking, dread and whatever the complete opposite of motivation is.

The year I constantly had to remind myself that it’s okay and I will be okay.